21

i tried to kill myself 21 days before my 21st birthday. i hadn’t planned on killing myself when i woke up that morning, but here i was, puking sour vomit into a bag.

the back of my throat burned. it was disgusting and i hated it and i vow to never try to overdose on pills again.

while vomiting, i had five realizations.

1. overdosing sucks

2. i am going to marry the man sleeping in the hospital chair beside me

3. i almost died

4. i don’t want to be dead

5. i miss my cat